A blessing

I went to a 15th anniversary and vows renewal party on Saturday night. An awful accident in August 2008 prompted the couple to have the party. The mother and her elder son got into a taxi with a malfunctioning brake. Despite their repeated pleads to pay the fare and be allowed off, the driver went down a steep and winding road. The taxi was out of control and hit a wall to a complete stop. The mother was thrown from the back to the front, hit the windshield head on and passed out on the spot. The son was stuck in the back, one leg broken.

I remember the night of the accident. Everyone showed up at the hospital on that night. The mother was in a coma and no one knew when and whether she could come around. Just when you think modern technology gives us more certainty in life, we had no clue of what could be done that night. The scans didn't indicate any blockage in the brain but she was still in a coma. The son, despite at a tender age of 9, was able to tell the police in details of what happened. The accident was bad but he was more concerned if he could have his mother back.

The family recounted the blessings at the party (i) The mother had no memory of all the events related to the accident. She couldn't remember she was screaming in the taxi or being hospitalized (ii) The son dealt with the trauma really well. He wasn't scarred (iii) The family got closer

How often can one be so lucky? I cannot answer that question. I should remember to always be good to my family and friends as I never know if there's a next time.

We've come a long way since 20 years ago. Really?

It rained hard last weekend. We were housebound and the weather brought me down memory lane. 20 years ago, students in Beijing demanded for democracy. Tian An Men Square may be a big place but there was not an empty spot that summer. People in Hong Kong went all out and there were over 1 million people on the street, voicing out their support for the students. The rain didn't stop people from making a strong statement, hoping that the officials sitting inside Zhong Nan Hai can hear what the people had to say.

20 years passed and I am no longer the same young student with lots of dreams in my head. Did I forget about what happened 20 years ago? Hell no! How can I forget about the scene of a man trying to stop a tank from moving forward by standing in front of it? How can I forget about grannies going up to military trucks to tell soldiers that they should go home instead of going into the city? And the same tricycle that people used to transport water melon in the summer time was used to transport injured students and supporters out of Tian An Men Square for medical help. It was bloody. You can almost smell the blood through the TV screen.

I suppose there is some medical advancement in this world that I am not aware of? Perhaps there's some truth in the movie "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind"? Some people in Hong Kong are trying to convince the others that May and June never existed back in 1989. I found it appalling that the Chief Executive of Hong Kong "represented" the people of Hong Kong when he was asked about 1989. Let's see, either I am not "people of Hong Kong" or he is talking BS. The CE must have been great at Dodgeball. He told everyone to focus on the economic development in China over the last 20 years. The standard of living might have improved in costal cities but I see a decline in the core values that make us people. The friendly neighbourhoods are disappearing. You can live next to your neighbour for 20 years without knowing who they are. Young people on public transport either pretend to sleep or focus on their video game when someone who needs a seat shows up. Can the CE crosses his heart and say we should all be pleased with the progress?

What scares me more is there are a bunch of youngsters who are the same age as I was when I marched to the race course in Happy Valley. They said the student movement was a riot and the students were armed with weapons and that's the reason of the PLA going to Tian An Men Square to protect the innocent. As I always say, the most powerful "Weapon of Mass Destruction" is people's mind and selective amnesia is spreading like wildfire.

Do I love China? I do because that's where my ancestors are from. Do I care about the Chinese government? Yes! My great grandparents and grandparents sold most of their asset in Hong Kong to help the party to build a new China like lots of other patriotic people back then. It pains me to see if things are not going well. What am I seeing now? Some zealots without a brain is trying to erase part of China's modern history. I am rereading "The Book of Laughter and Forgetting" and I get cold sweat when I think of some news articles and speeches given by those important elites of Hong Kong about June 1989.

I don't think it is possible for anyone to always make the right decision. History is a subject for us to learn from the past and reflect on the present. It is wrong to deny the history and it is "wronger" to teach fabricated history to the next generation. I am just an average mum but I am not going to allow my children to be brainwashed into a brain dead.

Three Cups of Tea

If you are reading this piece, please spread the words and tell your family and friends about the work by Greg Mortenson.

http://www.threecupsoftea.com/
http://www.ikat.org

I picked up the book on my way from immigration to the gate when I went to Shanghai for work couple weeks ago. The way I buy books, whether they are on any list at all, is to flip to some random page, read two to three paragraphs to see if I like what I am reading. I didn't know about the book but I liked the building school in Korphe, Pakistan part and paid my HKD 150 for it.

I had lots of doubt over America, especially after 9/11, the way the Bush administration dealt with issues (domestic and foreign) and the whole political correctness attitude across the country. What Greg Mortenson's work tells me is that there are people in America who still believe in doing good to people, whether they are American or not. Mind you, there's no gold or oil in Korphe even though you get lots of apricot. What I like about Greg Mortenson's work:

- The CAI schools do not teach Pakistani children the American way. The schools are there to help children to acquire the learning skills that will help them to define their own path in the future. The right way to fight terrorism is to let children to have the freedom of choice. Not to brainwash them one way or the other.

- Greg Mortenson resisted the association with the US government in fundraising in order to remain neutral.

- In his dealing with the locals in Pakistan and Afghanistan, he showed lots of respect to the locals by learning how to pray, speak the local language, listen to the elders for their advices...etc.

- He showed Pakistan and Afghanistan to outsiders the way they are. There was no glorification or derogation on anything.

These days, people have a funny look on their faces when the word "Muslim" comes up. Lots of people associate Muslim with Terrorism and Extremism. I believe no one is in the position to criticize a different culture or belief without getting to know it first. Lots of the problems we have right now stemmed from people drawing conclusion way before scratching through the surface. You think that's too far away from your life? Think of all the racial profiling going on in the US. Do you believe that there's no terrorist in a particular race? For those in Hong Kong, what about the police shooting a Pakistani man who lived in the woods close to a public estate couple weeks ago?

I remember a scene I saw at the hospital waiting room when I went for my prenatal check up. An English mother with her toddler son sat next to a mainland mother with her toddler son. The two kids could not communicate in a common language but they had fun rolling little matchbox cars around together. The differences in their appearance, cultural background, social standing didn't stop them from enjoying each other's company.

Three Cups of Book is a good story about building school but the important thing is that Greg Mortenson showed us how to bring peace to the world. We should remember the lesson and live it.

A small step for me, a big step for my secretary

The comfort from my morning 糯米鸡 didn't last very long. When I came back from a client meeting, I was told that a teach-in was switched to 2pm and a conference call with a client on a live deal will also start at 2pm. Problem and somehow, my secretary thought it was me being difficult..... I should go to Hogwarts and learn the spell so that I can travel back and forth in time!

I asked my secretary to reschedule our teach-in and the feedback was a perfect example of a Less is More "no room". It carries the following unspoke messages:

- I do not want to do anything beyond that
- Get lost

I asked if a makeshift meeting room next to our office was available and this is how the conversation went:

"Someone in ECM booked it"

"Do you know who booked it"

"So & So"

"Can we ask if So & So is willing to use the small office next door if he's just using the meeting room for conference call"

"They have priority"

"If he's having a small meeting or conference call, perhaps he'll be willing to use the small office instead. Can you check please?"

"They have priority"

I realized the conversation would not go anywhere and I took the matter in my hands before I blew up on my secretary. A short email was sent as So & So wasn't at his desk. Within minutes, I got the reply that I was looking for "No worries, all yours" at the expense of a coffee from Robuchon (I figure I can still afford it). All sorted and it didn't cost me an arm and a leg.

Why is it so difficult for people to be logical and reasonable? Is it that important to stick with the rules when there is a clear problem if the rules are followed? BTW, we are not committing a crime by breaking the "protocol" which was set by a bunch of people who have no comprehension of practicality.

Common sense is so not common!

The beauty of 糯米鸡 (Sticky Rice in Lotus Leaves)

I had to come to work early this morning and got off the taxi at the old Mandarin Oriental. Across the street is one of my favourite fast food shops. I know, it's not exactly healthy but I wanted to have something warm. I ordered a 糯米鸡 (Sticky Rice in Lotus Leaves, "Nor Mai Gai") and left the shop with a big smile on my face. It's usually sold out by 8:30am!

The 糯米鸡 is not as good as the ones I had as a child but I think it's the memory of it that makes it my comfort food. My parents used to send my brother and me to buy 糯米鸡 from the old man who steamed his 糯米鸡 in a big barrel on a wooden trolley in Winter nights. 糯米鸡 allows me to be a child again. The only worry I had back then was when I would turn 10 (double digit was a big thing somehow when I was young).

It's 9am and I would better read all the files before people start coming in to the office. The beautiful quiet morning is almost over.....

Flipping burgers

The ad "Help Wanted" at a burger joint that I frequent caught my eye yesterday. What if I quit my job and work at the burger place? I suspect the experience will be a very important lesson in my life.

First, I will be closer to reality. People in my industry have a very distorted world view. I started working in the midst of a market downturn. Yet, I was making more money than my classmates who slaved away as engineers. Those who were in med school were living around the poverty line. People around me at work were talking about holiday in exotic locations, buying second vacation home (Not second home but second VACATION home) in Southern France, converting old church in Austria into yet another vacation home. Weekends was about going to parties with other high-fliers, getting the boat out...etc. Let's take a minute to do the maths, they probably need to pay about USD 20K to 30K a month (back then!) for the mortgages around the world. I could only think of owners of conglomerates or criminals to be able to rake in that much money each month. If I flip burgers for a living, I will have to learn to live on a USD 1000 salary (if I am lucky). Guess what? That's the salary that lots of people in this city have to support a family of 4!

Second, I will have a real skill. When I was a trainee, I was told that we do really sophisticated work that requires genius to do. For a long time, I kind of believed in the I am smarter than most portion. That speech made me feel good and why shouldn't I believe in it? Then, I had a child. She pulled me back to planet Earth. A mother who is illiterate knows how to read the body language of an infant better than I do. I review my work again, lots of it is to move things around to come with a "solution". Not something that adds value to the world. If anything, it's making the rich richer... If I flip burger, at least I will learn not to spoil someone else's lunch.

Third, do I need a third? Lived in fantasy world for long enough and should really reconnect with other homo sapiens who got real problems to worry about.

Swear like a sailor

We have been reading Curious George to Changunnie and I decided to take her to a library on Sunday.

It was a very pleasant trip (at first.... keep reading!). Changunnie was ecstatic to hang out with older children. There were rows and rows of book cases and she saw the trolleys she read about in Curious George Goes to the Library. The children floor at the library was pretty well designed. Cushioned sofas, activities room, multi-media room... I was impressed and lots of good old memories came back. I used to go to the library across the street from our old home every day after school. I read Jin Yong (金庸) for the first time there and have been hooked ever since.

Grandma thinks it's not a good idea to let Changunnie listen to music on my iPod as I don't have enough classical music. I think it's fine for her to listen to Swing Out Sisters and Us3 but well... We were picking CDs when I heard a very loud voice swearing at the speed of light in complex sentences in the background. I have to say I was quite shocked to hear how "fluent" that person was despite the fact that I work in an environment where etiquette is not always on top of people's priority list and there are people around me who cannot express themselves without the introduction of profanity into their speech. I pulled Changunnie behind me and looked. A teenager about 15 to 16 of age was screaming at the librarians and security guards around him. The way he moved his limbs and how he turned his head around said something was not quite right with him. Just then, a middle age woman rushed up to pin him on a column. She kept saying "tell mummy what happened. Calm down, mummy will help you." She didn't care if people were looking at her and her son like some caged animals. People pointed and whispered. Eye contacts triggered the son to have another outburst.

I took Changunnie home soon after and did not know how it ended. I couldn't stop thinking of how difficult it was for that mother and I have lots of respect for her. People in town are still pretty ignorant and there is a general lack of respect for other people. Breastfeeding in public area attracts a crowd. Giving seat to people more in need on public transportation is considered as an act of stupidity. People circle up to watch injured passengers/pedestrains from car accident but no one calls for help.

When I was young, there was a stronger sense of community. We knew our neighbours and no one locked the doors. Yet, people knew better than to put their fingers on someone else's business. What had happened?

Lesser Panda Lesser Human?

What's the brand name of the cigarette that our great leader Deng Xiao-Ping used to smoke? Panda!

Very business savvy Chinese merchants did not want to let go of such great marketing effort left behind by our great leader, another brand called Xiao Xiong Mao (小熊猫) was created. And I located a pack today in Beijing. The name in English is "Lesser Panda". Hmm.......

The great leader smoked Panda, ordinary people smoke Lesser Panda. So, leaders are human and ordinary people are lesser human? Or should it be the other way round considering the performance of lots of the leaders at workplaces (big fat CASH bonus!) and in the government (at least in HK. I do not agree with most of the stuff that supposedly came from the mouth of our senior officials)

It has been a long time since I laughed so hard and the picture shows the wonderful pack to prove I did not make the story up and for you to see the snow (No! It's not dirt on the windshield!)

It is snowing in Beijing today. It's the first snow in the city this winter and it is unexpectedly peaceful and nice. I spent 5 mintues standing in the snow this morning. The staff at the hotel probably thought I were crazy. I checked the wrong weather forecast and wore a summer suit for Beijing. The only warm piece of clothing I have is my Patagonia fleece. Luckily, it is warm enough for someone with natural insulator like me but more importantly, I blend in well with the people of Beijing. Where is my hair band?